By Adults are also at a loss for words when it comes to passing on good practices to children. With these phrases we share, you will always have something constructive to say to them.
Children are the guarantee of a future just and empathetic society, so it is important to educate them, including through the management of their emotions. And with the phrases that we will present in this article, on emotional intelligence for children, we provide simple and direct statements that will help you organize your thoughts to deal with little ones.
Through these reflections, it is possible to relate to children in a more congruent way, in accordance with the values you want to transmit to them. Let’s go with them!
Emotional intelligence phrases for children: developing empathy
Daniel Goleman is the author of this theory on intelligence. In it, empathy, that ability to put oneself in the shoes of others and understand their feelings, is the basis of all emotional development, as far as social matters are concerned. Prosocial behaviors are built on this, so keep an eye on these reflections to improve it.
- “I’m here for you.”
- “I understand what you feel.”
- “We must understand before we judge.”
- “I would feel the same as you if that happened to me.”
- “Treat others as you would like to be treated.”
- “Empathy is like giving someone a hug with your mind.”
- “Never do to anyone what you don’t like done to you.”
- “Without your friends, your hardest times would be even worse.”
- “Try to understand before you are understood.” (Stephen Covey)
- “When you stop hating someone you won’t feel happy, you’ll feel like the other.”
- “If you judge people, you have no time to love them.” (Saint Teresa of Calcutta)
- “Attention is the rarest and purest form of generosity.” (Simone Weil)
- “Empathy is about finding echoes of another person in yourself.” (Mohsin Hamid)
- “We have two ears and one mouth to listen twice as much as we speak.” (Epictetus)
- “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” (Plato)
- “When people talk, listen. Most people never listen.” (Ernest Hemingway)
- “He who does not understand a glance, will not understand a long explanation.” (Arabic proverb)
- “If you love someone, their happiness will be yours, because you will be happy about the good things that happen to them.”
- «Even if you feel bad when your friend cries, don’t be afraid: you are being brave and a good person. Help him.»
- “If you understand what another person is feeling, you are already a wise person. It doesn’t matter how old you are.”
- “Sometimes, when it comes to people close to you, it’s harder to know how they feel. That’s okay, we can talk about it.”
- “When our hearts are filled with empathy, a strong desire to eliminate the suffering of others arises within us.” (Matthew Quick)
- “Understand what happens to you and you will know what happens to everyone else.” (Paulo Coelho). A way to develop self-concept as well as empathy .
- “If you don’t understand how others feel or act to help them, it doesn’t matter if you get good grades, because part of your intelligence is not developing.”
- “Being empathetic is seeing the world through the eyes of another, and not seeing our world reflected in their eyes.” A more complex phrase, for older children. It helps to differentiate emotion from projection.
With these phrases you will sow the seed that pushes children to pay attention to other people’s emotions, as well as to help them in their battles. But empathy is not the only component of emotional intelligence, so let’s continue with more reflections.
Phrases to help children regulate their emotions
Another part of emotional intelligence that must be developed from childhood is self-regulation. To do this, it is necessary to validate what they feel and help them find mechanisms so that their feelings are drivers of action, not blockage and frustration (or inappropriate behavior). Let’s look at some phrases to exemplify this:
- “I got angry too, shall we calm down together?”
- “We will find a solution to this problem together.”
- “You can’t control what you feel, but you can control what you do.”
- «Are you feeling joy? Laugh, jump, hug your friends. All of this is good.»
- “If you never try to get rid of anger, you are the one who will suffer the most.”
- “Fear is not your enemy, it tells you what to be careful of.”
- “I cry when I’m sad too. Don’t let anyone tell you that crying is bad.”
- “If you feel rejection, walk away. You don’t have to stay where you’re not comfortable.”
- “No matter how you feel, you can always do something to feel better.”
- “I think we shouldn’t argue now. When you feel better, we’ll talk.”
- “Why do you want to hit things? Let’s think of another way to resolve that anger.”
- “If you need some time to calm down, that’s okay. When you feel better, I’ll be here.”
- “Don’t forget what has hurt you, but don’t let it continue to hurt you.”
- “If you learn to relieve your pain, anger and frustration, no one will be able to hurt you.”
- “If you learn to manage your emotions well now, you will be an incredible person when you grow up.”
- “I have made many mistakes, but I have learned from them and now I do things better.”
- “What you’re feeling now will pass. You’re not going to be sad forever, or angry, or disgusted.”
- “Facing something you can’t solve is worse than going around it. Let’s find another solution.”
- “It’s normal to get angry when someone does something bad to you. Express it without fear, but also without violence.”
- “If someone rejects you, that’s okay. That means there’s someone better waiting to be your friend.”
- “We adults also get sad and angry, but we express it in different ways.”
- “If you don’t get something right the first time, it’s not because you’re unintelligent, it’s because you need a couple more tries.”
- “It’s normal to feel envious when someone has something good. But you must learn to be happy for them, not take it away from them.”
- “Tell me why you feel that way.” This phrase is a support for the infant, intended to promote self-awareness and healthy emotional expression.
- “Sometimes sleep, pain or hunger make us feel bad. Does any of this happen to you?” This is another useful way to help children establish connections between their physiological state and their emotions.
Remember when you felt bad and someone told you that “big kids don’t cry” or that your anger wasn’t valid ? It’s time to get out of those dynamics and grow with our children.
Emotional intelligence phrases for children and their motivations
Motivation is a fundamental element, as it is related to setting goals, willingness to work and maintaining determination. Without it, the hardest learning is abandoned and the person loses faith in themselves, thus creating a negative self-concept that will affect their adult life. Let’s look at some motivational phrases in the emotional field.
- “You’re doing well.”
- «Rest if you need to.»
- “I trust in you and that you will achieve it.”
- “It may not be easy, but it will be worth it.”
- “I believe in your promise and I know that you will keep it.”
- “You don’t need me to do it, and that’s a good thing.”
- “When you feel like you can’t take it anymore, I’ll be here.”
- “Good things come to those who wait .”
- “If you get tired, learn to rest, not to give up.”
- “I’m so proud of how hard you’re trying.”
- “The important thing is not what is promised, but what is fulfilled.”
- «Never give up. Sometimes the last key is the one that opens the door.»
- “Some things aren’t your fault because you can’t control them.”
- “I see that you are improving with every step. Don’t doubt that you are improving.”
- “Your good deeds will be rewarded sooner or later, you’ll see.”
- “If you continue on this path, you will be an excellent person when you grow up.”
- “If it makes you happy, that’s fine, no matter what anyone says. Go for it.”
- “If the plan doesn’t work, change the plan, but don’t change the goal.” (Anonymous)
- “Don’t compare yourself to others. You are the only person you have to surpass.”
- “If you let go of your fears, you’ll have more room to live your dreams.” (Marilyn Monroe)
- “Even if you did something wrong, I know you meant well. You’ll do better next time.”
- “If the path gets harder and harder, it’s like in video games: you’re closer to beating it.”
- “The real achievement is not reaching the goal, but having overcome all the obstacles that stood before.”
- “In order to move forward, sometimes you have to take a step back.” This is an enlightening quote about the ups and downs of progressing toward goals.
- “You will not drown by falling into the sea, but by not getting out of it.” A useful metaphor to help understand that it is okay to have setbacks, but that the crucial thing is to overcome them.
These motivational phrases help to establish thoughts of improvement, helping the child to be aware of his achievements and to improve tolerance to failure and frustration. Do not hesitate to encourage him, because no stage of life is without effort .
Phrases to develop social skills in children
Learning to relate in a healthy and effective way should be worked on from childhood. It is part of children’s emotional intelligence and is the gateway to many opportunities in adult life ; so, pay attention to these phrases.
- “Before you fight, talk.”
- “Before you speak, think.”
- “You deserve respect too.”
- “Having good friends is a treasure.”
- “You should always keep your promises.”
- «Be kind to others, for yourself and for them.»
- “Give back twice as much happiness as you receive.”
- “You will achieve much more if you work as a team.”
- «Choose your friends carefully, but when you have them, take care of them.»
- “It’s okay to be angry with your friend. Talk to him and work it out.”
- “Never let yourself be abused, but don’t abuse others to defend yourself either.”
- “Surround yourself with people smarter than you and you will never stop improving.”
- “Lying can get you out of a tight spot, but it should never be your first option.”
- “You have the ability to hurt others. That’s not a skill, but a defect.”
- “It doesn’t matter what other people are like or what they look like. All people deserve respect.”
- “Never use violence to get what you want. You will end up losing it if you do so.”
- “Some people will love you for what you have. Stay with the people who love you for who you are.”
- “If you haven’t been able to make peace with your friend today, don’t worry. You’ll definitely be able to tomorrow.”
- “If someone doesn’t want to hang out with you, it doesn’t matter: there are better people out there to pay attention to.”
- “A class works well if all your classmates behave properly. You must contribute to that.”
- “Getting better grades than your classmates is not going to make you happier: to avoid unhealthy competition.”
- “You do what you do best and others master what you do worst. Together you will achieve great things.”
- «Sometimes friends don’t last forever, and that’s okay. There are so many amazing people out there to meet.»
- “If someone at school says or does something unfair to you, it doesn’t matter if it’s a teacher or a student. Tell me and we’ll sort it out.”
- “Don’t be afraid to say what you think, but don’t hurt others with your words.” This is a phrase that teaches assertiveness .
These emotional intelligence phrases for children and their social skills are really useful to add a moral to their interpersonal conflicts or as advice. Do not hesitate to use them to conceptualize respect, reciprocity and assertiveness in your child.
Other phrases about emotional intelligence for children
Finally, here are some emotional intelligence phrases that contribute to the educational process of children. They are somewhat more complex, so choose carefully when you use them, as they must be understood in depth.
- “Big egos have small ears.” (Robert Schuller)
- “Will is intention favored by emotions.” (Raheel Farooq)
- “The things we love tell us who we are.” (Saint Thomas Aquinas)
- “Happiness is not the absence of problems, it is the ability to deal with them.”
- “The hardest thing in the world is to be aware of someone else’s pain.” (Pat Barker)
- “Understanding that there are other points of view is the beginning of wisdom.” (Joseph Campbell)
- “There is no barrier, no lock, no bolt, that you can impose on the freedom of my mind.” (Virginia Woolf)
- “I don’t ask the hurt person how he feels. I become the hurt person myself.” (Walt Whitman)
- “It is only with the heart that one can see clearly: what is essential is invisible to the eyes.” (Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince )
- “Patience is not the ability to wait, but the ability to maintain a good attitude while waiting.”
- “Until you learn to be tolerant of people who disagree with you and are able to say a few kind words to those you do not admire, you will not be successful or happy.” (Napoleon Hill)
Emotional intelligence is key to educating new generations
Have you ever used any of these phrases? As adults responsible for the education of the new generations, we have a titanic task: to leave better people than those who existed when we were children.
Emotional intelligence (social skills, empathy, assertiveness, self-awareness and emotional regulation) is the driving force behind it all. Let us be its fuel.