By What can we do to heal and grow after a friend’s betrayal? In this article, we offer you different alternatives to help you resolve this situation and achieve healthier relationships.
Betrayal by a friend can be a painful and difficult experience to overcome, making us question our trust in others. In fact, the Journal of Trauma & Dissociation states that the concept of “betrayal traumas” was introduced 30 years ago, which is associated with events and patterns of events that imply a profound social betrayal.
In order to recover from this situation, it is important to evaluate the friendship and reflect on whether the relationship is healthy and reciprocal . Therefore, we should not force ourselves to maintain a toxic friendship just because of the time invested in it. Sometimes, the best option is to distance ourselves and seek more positive connections. Likewise, it is crucial to understand that getting over betrayal does not mean maintaining the friendship.
We know that getting over the betrayal of a close friend is complicated , especially because we consider them part of our family. However, through this text we will give you some recommendations to help you deal with this situation in the best possible way. Don’t miss any details.
How to get over a friend’s betrayal?
According to an article in the journal Behavior Research and Therapy , acts of betrayal are largely related to malicious disclosures of confidential data, infidelity, or some form of disloyalty.
When faced with these types of events, it is essential to take care of ourselves and find ways to heal and grow . Practicing self-care and emotional well-being , through techniques such as meditation, regular exercise, and taking care of our physical and mental health, will help us rebuild our confidence.
We can also use this experience as an opportunity to reflect on our own actions and behaviors in friendships, working on improving as friends and colleagues. Below are some tips that you might find useful.
Through time, patience, and self-compassion, we can heal our wounds and move toward healthier, more meaningful relationships in the future.
1. Allow yourself to experience and process your emotions
After experiencing a betrayal from a friend, it is normal to have a wide range of emotions, such as anger, sadness, confusion, or even hopelessness. It is essential to allow yourself to feel these emotions and give them space to be processed.
Don’t bottle up your feelings, as this can prolong the healing process. Find healthy ways to express your emotions, such as talking to someone you trust, writing in a journal, or engaging in creative activities that allow you to release your feelings.
2. Evaluate the friendship and set boundaries
Betrayal can be a sign that the friendship itself needs to be evaluated. Take time to reflect on the relationship and analyze whether there were previous warning signs or negative behavior patterns. Ask yourself if the friendship was balanced, if there was mutual respect, and if core values were shared.
Evaluating the friendship will help you better understand whether it is worth keeping in your life or whether you need to move on. Also, set clear and healthy boundaries to protect yourself and prevent future betrayals. Communicate your expectations and needs assertively and make sure they are respected.
3. Seek support from trusted people
In difficult times, it is important to surround yourself with trusted people who provide emotional support. Find friends or family members who are understanding and empathetic, and share your feelings with them.
Active listening and support from people close to you can help you process the betrayal and gain perspective on the situation. If you feel you need additional support, consider seeking the help of a therapist, who can offer you specific tools and strategies to overcome the betrayal and heal emotionally.
4. Forgive, but take action
Forgiveness can be a liberating process, but it doesn’t mean you have to maintain the friendship or allow the betrayal to happen again. Evaluate whether the betrayal is forgivable based on your personal values and boundaries.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting or justifying the betrayal, but rather freeing yourself from the emotional burden it carries. If you decide to forgive, set clear boundaries and communicate your expectations assertively. This way, you’ll protect your emotional well-being and prevent the situation from happening again in the future.
5. Find ways to heal and grow
A friend’s betrayal can be a painful and difficult experience to overcome, but it can also provide you with an opportunity to heal and grow as a person. Explore different activities such as meditation, regular exercise, time outdoors, and taking care of your physical and mental health.
Find activities that bring you joy and help you rebuild your trust in others. Likewise, use this experience as an opportunity to reflect on your own actions and behaviors in friendships, and seek to grow and improve as a friend.
6. Learn to trust again
After a betrayal, it can be difficult to trust others again. However, you should not let one bad experience define all your future relationships. Keep in mind that not all people are the same and that sincere and loyal friendships do exist .
Allow yourself to open up to new connections and relationships, but do so slowly and with healthy boundaries in place. Observe how others act and behave over time before fully trusting them. Remember that trust is built over time and consistency in actions.
7. Learn to forgive yourself
In the midst of a betrayal, it’s common for people to blame themselves or feel ashamed for trusting someone who has betrayed them. It’s important to remember that the responsibility for the betrayal lies with the other person, not you. Allow yourself to forgive yourself for any role you may have played in the situation and avoid blaming yourself excessively.
Accept that we all make mistakes and that learning from them is part of personal growth. Cultivate self-compassion and work on rebuilding your self-esteem and self-confidence.
8. Seek psychological help if you need it
In addition to the tips above, it is important to highlight that the support of a psychologist through therapy is a useful tool to overcome the betrayal of a friend. Therapy provides a safe and confidential space where we can explore our emotions , better understand our relationship patterns, and develop healthy strategies to deal with pain and disappointment.
A trained psychotherapist can help us process our emotions in a healthy way, providing us with specific guidance and tools to deal with betrayal and its emotional consequences.
Through therapy, we can gain an objective perspective and receive the support needed to heal our emotional wounds and rebuild our trust in others.
You can always get over a betrayal
Getting over a friend’s betrayal can be a challenging process, but with time, self-compassion, and the right support, it is possible to heal and move forward. Evaluating the friendship and setting healthy boundaries are important steps to protecting yourself in the future. Remember that forgiveness is a personal choice and does not imply the continuation of the friendship.
Use this experience as an opportunity to grow, learn, and strengthen your future relationships. Over time, you will find peace and trust again, allowing you to build relationships based on honesty, loyalty, and mutual respect.